Divorce... Are you a statistic???

Life on your own

2009-10-26T12:50:00.000-07:00

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Can you imagine living life alone? How would you cope.

Someone pointed out an interesting article on solitary confinement titled “Hellhole” by Atul Gawande in the March 30 issue of The New Yorker. The article focuses on involuntary solitude, but some physiological results of voluntary solitude are similar. The article describes hostages, prisoners of war, detained terror suspects, and high security prison inmates as involuntary sufferers of solitary confinement and its physiological and psychological effects. The dubious history of solitary confinement and its recent resurrection as a practice elicits reflection on why the practice is torture; this is taken from http://www.hermitary.com/thatch/?p=613.

It is said that this can drive a sane person to insanity. They can reach a point where they actually hear voices and this drives them literally crazy, since they reach a point where they cannot determine what is right from wrong, or whatis true or false.

What is your take on it?

Living

2009-10-26T12:42:00.000-07:00

Sometimes you need to unwind and feel free, at times you wish to just link friends and well wishers, you can just visit HTTP://mylot.com/Catilda you can find peacefull discussions that will enlighten and uplift you.

Too many times we seek a haven on the internet and cannot find it but here is a place that will allow you to be yourself and get the respect that you deserve.

Life without a Spouse

2009-10-26T10:36:00.000-07:00

Being a widower or a widow is not an easy thing to cope with in life, as well as being divorced, the sentiment may not be the same but the pain still the same. There are thousands of persons living around us who are trying to make life worth living after the passing of a love one or even after divorce.

How do these people cope, you may ask yourself: One person stated that she use to wake up in the middle of the night calling her spouse's name. Even after a divorce that has ended amicably, one finds onself longing for the other on some levels. Dead or alive there is a gap that needs to be filled.

It’s not an easy situation when a marriage or other significant relationship ends in divocre or death. Whatever the reason for the split , broken relationships can turn your world inside out and cause all sorts of unsettling feelings. Re- marry is sometimes the answer but sometimes not for everyone, especially for those who do not need another relationship. Here are some tips that can help you cope:

Get out more and join friends
read a book, or go to the park
join support groups
make new friends
Maybe trying dating again ( depending on your situation)

You may be sad now but life goes on, and it is expected of you to live it.

What does marriage really mean?

2009-10-26T09:51:00.000-07:00

Marriage today is not what was yesterday. Marriage is the coming together of two consenting individuals and it a union that is sanctioned by God. It is also an institution that is built around love for each other and holds the foundation of family and family life. This is the type of marriage that our Grandparents knew and endorsed. Not one which embrace lust and love for self.

Marriage is a lifetime commitment, a plan to be together with someone for better or for worse until one partner dies. This is where marriage should end really; not with annulments and divorce. It is said that divorce is sanctioned if on party commits adultery. We are not all perfect and it humanly to want to no wrong, therefore if the giver of the law pardons the law breaker why can’t we pardon each other and move on. This will result in less divorce and more forgiveness.
A divorce is the termination process of a valid marriage between two people. There are though many persons have different reasons, the repercussions are far reaching. It is hard for persons who can’t see eye to eye to come to an amicable agreement, therefore divorce always seem to be the most available option.
The major reason for divorce includes the following:
lack of commitment
lost of sexual desire for each other
abandonment
lack of effective communication.
Abuse.
Given all these reason, these are not new to our grand parents. They encountered these problems too. And what did they do to get pass these hurdles:
They learnt the art of apology – we need to apologize more. When we are wrong we need to admit that we are wrong and let others be aware that we are sorry about it.
Let our partner know what we are feeling – Sometimes all they need to know is what is going on inside our heads. Just let them know that we are not comfortable with a certain decision and add reasons and workable solutions.
Accept the spouse point of view even though you think there is a better way. Let the spouse know your option and both and have lengthy discussions on them.
COMPROMISE
Commit to improve behavioral patterns and stick to your commitment.

Currently the divorce statistic in the Caribbean is
There are ways in which marriages can work, but we just need to be patient enough to work at it.